I have to be honest, the "idea" of this website has gone through MANY iterations. I have wanted it to be thought provoking, intelligent, witty, informative, provocative, and educational. You know, all of that polished "Pinterest" type shit. I felt a need to provide information about so many facets of what it means to be a female Black American in the 21st century. What it means to be a Black femaile living in another country in the 21st century. Noble? Perhaps. But really, it was a sense of therapy for me as I tried to figure out how, and where, I fit in this fucked up world.
Initially, I wanted everything to be perfect. I performed a ton of research, read a shit load of books, watched some deep documentaries and started a ton of articles that I never had time to finish. Then, life got in the way, as it always does. So my "contribution" never came to fruition. I wanted everything to be so perfect that I got lost in the details. I sabotaged myself. It wasn't "perfect". But, I have come to realize that it doesn't have to be perfect as life is not that way. So here I am, bad grammar and all, exposing myself to whatever may come. Enter at your own risk . . .
While this site is still developing, and changing, I am putting it out in the universe so that I am forced to be accountable. It's not perfect or polished, but neither am I, so let's see where this goes!
As we embark on this journey, please know that I am #FinishedWIthFuckery. In other words, I curse, A LOT. If you follow me on Twitter (hey!!) then you know that "fuck" is my favorite word. I think it should be incorporated into every single sentence. There are days that I try to do just that. I am proud of that fact. Actually, there have been studies that show people who curse a lot are either really happy or really smart. Don't believe me? You can see it for yourself in the article here or here or you can read a whole book about it here. Whatever you are in to is fine.
I don't judge . . . well, actually I do, but that is for another day ;-)
So for now, as we embark on this journey, you will get to see random chaos that comes from my mind. But, don't get it twisted, there is a method to my madness! Most of the time you may not like what I have to say (especially if you are white) and that is okay. I will put some links up to get you with a therapist you can talk to, a support group, or you can check out my Books and Podcast section for a little help.
I am not here to be kind or help with your feelings. I will just say, #FuckYourFeelings. I know, that seems really harsh, but it needs to be said. Also, it felt really good . . . Not gonna lie.
Since I pay for this site, I am the #HNIC and whatever I say goes. Them the rules. If you are looking for something a little less "angry" then you might want to redo your Google search. Nothing and NO ONE is off limits here. You have been warned.
So, if you are still here reading this, "Welcome" to my world. Some might call it crazy, I call it life.
I am a bi-racial (Black identified) woman who fell in love and married a German man and now I live in Europe. I have a fucking awesome husband (hereinafter "the Hubster") and two amazingly complicated children (hereinafter "Mini-Me #1" and "Mini-Me #2"). I am an immigrant, an activist, a business woman, and I have been known to slap people (like really hard) and I take no bullshit. I think it is one of my best qualitites, the jury is still out with my friends and family.
I am a survivor of sexual abuse and violence. I have stories, I might share some of them. Then again, maybe not. It's all fluid right now. My mother (hereinafter "Mom") is my rock, even though she is a white, card carrying Tea Party member, and gave me KKK familial lines that she refuses to fully elaborate on, and she voted for the "current occupant" of the people's house. Oh, and she is still not "completely" convinced that Obama wasn't born in Kenya. *sigh* Her visits are ALWAYS AWESOME! My father (who was Black) has never been in the picture. Not because he wasn't a good father but because he was dead. He was killed by a police officer. Shot in the head. Because he was Black. The cop that shot him liked to rack up bodies. That is just how it was, but yet still is.
Most importantly, I am an educated Black woman who worked my ass off for everything I have. I love researching anything and I know how to code-switch in a hot second so be careful. I feel that #I-Survived for a reason. Still trying to figure out what it is, exactly, that I am supposed to do so I guess you get to join me on this little adventure.
All jokes aside, we are living in a time where people really have to show up or get out. There can't be any gray lines. I will put my thoughts, and parts of my life, out there, but I will also aim to amplify other Black women's voices and plights. We are truly in this together and we can't foget that.
So folks, put your seatbelts on, it's about to get bumpy!